Kalista is 7 months old!

This post is almost a week late,

SORRRYY.

Kali is 7 months old!

I can hardly believe it.

She's such a perfect, beautiful little girl.

I can't even begin to explain how much I adore her.

At 7 months old:

-She has two bottom teeth

-She screams super loud whenever she's playing and strangers that don't know her, think she's crying when she does it. But she's not. ha

-She tries hard to sing

-She is obsessed with her Daddy. She goes crazy when he comes home from work...I'm pretty much chopped liver when he's around and she wants nothing to do with me.

-She loves it when when I do her hair. It's the only time that she willingly holds still. (I can't put it in a ponytail yet, but I can create some awesome hairstyles. haha)

-She is slowly starting to understand how to move to grab things. She's not crawling yet though!

-She loves the little puff cereal, any flavor.

-Whenever I try to a- change her diaper or b- put her in her car seat. I can almost always expect a fit. No joke she clenches her fists so hard that her hands start to shake, she holds her breath until she turns red and then busts out into a full on scream until I'm done changing her, or I'm holding her car seat. yeah. not sure if that's normal behavior for a 7 month old or if she's just extremely spoiled!

-She usually talks herself to sleep in the car, during nap time, or bedtime.

-She's a curious girl and wants to test out everything she can get her hands on...with her mouth.

-She still loves music

-She loves when I'm singing to her...even if it sounds like a dying cat.

-She loves things that light up. 

-She's finally getting some Chub!

-She loves sitting in the shopping cart. 

-If we tell her to 'shake her booty', she'll kick her legs and bounce up and down. haha it's so cute   

  

-She loves to read books

-She doesn't care if I put a headband on her, but when we're in the car, she'll play with them...which causes them to stretch out, so I'll randomly find her with the headband around her eyes. She doesn't even cry when it happens either. I have to just find her that way. hahaha  

Surgery.

So,

Kali's surgery was Tuesday.

We woke up that morning to a happy girl [like always],

Smiling and cooing, talking to us both.

We got ready for the day,

knowing that we had to be to PCMC by noon.

We tried to keep her comfortable,

while distracting her from the fact that she could not have anything to eat until after surgery.

I packed all of the things we would need,

and we headed out the door to the Hospital.

I talked with Tyson a bit on the way there about how,

even though her pediatrician said that her surgery was simple and only involved inserting a catheter and letting out small beads,

The paperwork I got in the mail,

that I had only read the day before (oops),

said that they were doing an incision.

I was a little bit worried,

but not too much because I was just going to believe what an actual person told me,

not some dumb paper.

When we arrived,

we sat in the waiting room for them to do Kali's checkup to make sure she was healthy for the surgery.

She was peacefully asleep while we waited.

I just kept thinking that the poor girl had no idea what was about to happen.

When they called her name,

we had to wake her up while they weighed her, checked her,

and gave us a gown to change her in.

Afterwards,

The nurse walked us to another waiting room,

where we'd wait until it was time for her to go back.

We waited there while I cuddled and kissed the heck out of her

and she played with her Daddy...

(who obviously is a lot less annoying. haha)

and before we knew it,

her Urologist was walking up to us.

She began explaining the procedure to us.

This is where I learned that they were,

indeed,

doing an incision.

I wasn't happy about it to say the least,

and pretty upset about the fact that no one told me this until now!

After she finished explaining everything,

she left and the anesthesiologist came in.

He told us that he was going give her a mask to put her to sleep,

then do what they call a Cottle (which is similar to an epidural)

to help numb the area so that she wouldn't be in pain when she woke up.

That is when they would insert the I.V.,

and give her a breathing tube as well as a catheter.

When he was done explaining everything to us,

he walked us back to the furthest point we could go.

I didn't want to let go of my baby. I was holding back tears.

She was a little fussy and us both kissing her wasn't helping that.

Then,

After giving myself a silent pep talk,

I handed her over to the anesthesiologist,

a guy I had just barely met,

who I knew was going to take her to a group of people,

Who would cause her pain..

(Deep down I knew it was for the best, but at a time like this,

all I could think about was how much I despised everything about the situation)

I watched as he turned the corner with my daughter in his arms

and the last thing I saw was her grabbing at his mask.

That is when I burst into tears.

It was hard to hold back and honestly,

I could have cried a lot harder than I did...

I was still holding it in a WHOLE bunch!

Tyson was incredible through all of this.

He is my rock and held me while I cried.

We were then led to yet another waiting room.

I couldn't hold it in for very long so we quickly decided to go for a walk.

We ended up going to our car,

and I cried while we prayed for comfort and Kali's safety.

We then walked hand in hand back to the waiting room

where we waited for two hours until finally

the Urologist came in and told us everything went well.

10 minutes later,

they called for us and said that only one of us could go back to the ICU to see her.

She had just woken up.

Tyson let me.

again, I love him SO MUCH.

He asked me to send him a picture...

and this was the only one I could take before picking her up and trying to comfort my poor baby who had no idea what was going on.

Her whole face seemed so swollen and her was cry the most heartbreaking thing I've ever heard.

She seemed miserable.

Here's the battle wound.
I don't know if you can see them both but she will have both of those tubes coming out of her for a week. It's how she pees for now.

Very shortly after this,

We were moved to the room we would be staying in for the remainder of our stay.

That is when we met with Tyson.

(This girl ROCKED at her job. I loved her. She was my favorite CNA there by far.)

Once we got some food into Kali's belly...which took forever since she couldn't eat right after,

She began acting very close to her normal self.

She even sat up, played with some toys and smiled a little!

I was so happy that she seemed okay.

...Then,

about an hour later,

her Cottle began to wear off.

Even though she had Toradol AND Oxycodone,

she still seemed in pain.

Her cry was crushing me.

Her voice was gone too because of the breathing tube and it killed me to see her that way.

After holding her, while rocking her in the chair and singing her some songs...

she finally fell asleep.

After about 10 minutes,

I decided to try to lay her in the crib.

She stayed asleep for about a minute.

Then woke right up.

She had a very difficult night.

I eventually,

put her in her stoller and we seriously walked around the entire hospital...

then when we got back to our room,

she fell asleep.

She slept that way in the stroller for half the night,

then woke up and after another couple hours of rocking, coaxing and trying to get her to sleep,

she spent the rest in the crib.

I probably had 3 hours of sleep.

Kali maybe had 5 or 6?

They almost kept us there another night because of how fussy she was,

but that morning she made up for it and was in such a good mood.

We ended up leaving around 4:00 pm.

The next night went pretty well.

She only woke up twice.

(usually she doesn't wake up at all, but considering the circumstances,

she did awesome).

Last night however,

was a different story and it's been like this ever since.

She was awake a good majority of the night.

I had to rock her and tickle her back until she fell asleep.

She was sleeping with us because she would wake up if one of us wasn't touching her.

But by about 3 am...

she wouldn't go back to sleep.

She was kicking us both.

HARD for an almost 7 month old btw.

ha.

She has been SO tired all day because of that,

but again,

she won't sleep unless we're touching her.

Hence,

this picture...

She's been rubbing her eyes,

and acting so tired,

but will NOT fall asleep unless she's touching us.

Tyson had her sitting on the floor and was trying to talk to her...

and she put her head on his..and was asleep almost instantaneously.

Poor girl.

I hope she starts feeling better cause it's killing me to see her so sick.

No Offense...

I've had some experiences these last few months that have kind of opened my eyes.

They've made me more aware of the mean things I've said or done in my life.

First I want to say that I've never in my life ever done something to intentionally hurt another person.

EVER

I know how it feels to be hurt or offended by somone.

With that being said,

I know that I have hurt other people.

I'm sure there's people out there that i've hurt of offended,

that I don't even know about.

This post is mostly for those people.

It's emotionally draining to realize the pain or hurt I've caused others.

Realizing things that I've done is hard.

I feel so so mean.

a few weeks ago,

I decided to try apologizing to one of those people.

It didn't go as I'd hoped.

It's taken me until now,

to decide to move on to the next person.

My goal is to at least clear my conscience.

The other person can decide whether or not they accept my sincere apology.

I can't control that if they do or not.

(which is another lesson I've learned as of late.)

I just want to apologize right now to everyone that I may have hurt or offended.

The times that I have been intentionally rude,

are the times I was hurt or offended myself,

and trying to protect my feelings.

That's not an excuse though and that is why I am apologizing.

I am sorry.

If I've offended you. I am sorry.

I really try to be a good person,

but I've realized recently that I have been very selfish when it comes to others feelings.

I  don't know how it's possible to apologize to those I am not aware that I've offended besides this.

So I hope this post does something.

As for now,

I'm on a mission to correct my wrongs.

It's going to take a while though.

Because today I resumed my mission on someone else,

and in just 15 minutes I had cried enough tears to fill a bathtub.

But this person...

is the most forgiving person.

The most incredible person.

and the most perfect husband.

and that's why I married him.

Yeah. He's been a victim of my selfish mean words.

Yet, he still acts like I'm perfect.

I think I married the only man in the world that is patient enough to put up with me,

and I love him so much.

I just hope I can somehow forget the things I've done to him.

Because that's what is holding me back.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Kali with her cousin Jada. Kali less than a month older than Jada.

They're going to be great friends!

Thanksgiving this year was so fun,

but SO busy!!

We woke up at 8:00 am.

and if you know us at all,
when Tyson has a day off...

we sleep until like...10:30.

I know.

don't judge.

haha

Anyway,

We went to Walmart because Tyson wanted to find out what time everyone could start lining up for PS3's. He wants one so bad. ha He keeps saying it's because of the blue ray, but we both know he is a gaming nerd.

So,

they said 5:00 pm.

Then we stopped at my parents house so I could shower my Oma,

then left from there right to Tyson's grandmas house for THANKSGIVING!

It was delish, but we couldn't stay there for as long as we wanted to.

(let me just say that I knew Tyson was the one I was supposed to marry when, at family get togethers, they play board games. Yes. I'm obsessed! haha)

We had to leave at 2:30,

because my Aunt was having thanksgiving at her house as well.

We decided after this that we are going to switch families every year.

We're not doing both families every year anymore because we don't really actually get to spend time with either of them because we're in a rush to go to the next place.

Ridiculous.

Anyway,

we were there for about the same amount of time we were at his grandmas,

because at 4:15,

we had to leave because Tyson wanted to go stand in line at walmart.

of course my brother wanted to come with us, because he's just as big of a nerd as my husband.

They were so worried that we wouldn't get a PS3 because there were only 50...

we got there at 4:58 (which stressed him the heck out...)

and when we got in line...

It was apparant, we weren't late.

We were the first in line.

People didn't start showing up until around 7.

I gotta say.

Sitting in line for 5 hours was just...lovely.

hahaha

I found some books throughout the store to read to Kali,

so she would stay entertained.

She's a book worm like her mama.

After a few hours,

Kali had enough and my mom ended up taking her for the rest of the time.

Long story short,

Tyson got his  PS3 and according to him,

his life is now complete.

He said "my wife, daughter and a PS3 is all I need"

I'll remember that next year ;)

haha

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

I'm grateful for my life, family and everything.

seriously.

We couldn't be more blessed.

Mixed Emotions

This was Kali when I told her that she won't be getting anymore UTI's after December 6th

(at least for a LONG time.)

No obviously she really has no idea what's going on.

I just like this picture :)

We talked to the Urologist last week.

and Kali does indeed need surgery.

It's Scheduled for December 6th.

I'm SOO happy that she is finally going to get this dealt with.

Bye Bye UTI's!

On the other hand,

I'm an emotional wreck.

Before they actually said she needed surgery,

I was hoping for it because it meant my daughter would no longer have to deal with this horrible stuff.

and yeah I knew that it would be so sad,

but now that it's actually happening,

I'm starting to get really scared.

I'm so glad that this isn't any major surgery,

because I'm pretty sure I would die if it was.

I don't think I'd be able to handle it. 

I can't even stand to think about handing Kali over to the Doctor and not being there for her through the entire thing.

I have to sit there for who knows how long,

while I know that my daughter has been put to sleep and being worked on.

It's going to kill me.

I can't even imagine how my parents felt when my little baby brother had to have Open heart surgery.

Or my cousins when their new baby daughter had to have brain surgery.

I'm so grateful that Kali's problems aren't more serious than this...

but I gotta say,

I'm a baby and I'm still going to worry like crazy until she is back in my arms and feeling better.

Because they are working on both sides and she's so little,

she has to stay there over night and then have 2 tubes (which I'm assuming are catheters...) coming out of her for a week.

They wanted to schedule the surgery for the December 21st.

Can you imagine?? She would still be recovering on Christmas.

So glad they changed it to the 6th.

So,

I'm having mixed emotions about this,

but all in all I'm SO GRATEFUL that this problem is fixable.

and I'm happy that Surgery will help her feel all better. 

Kalista is 6 Months old

Kalista is 6 months old!! it baffles me how fast this happened.

I can't believe it's already been half a year!

Where the heck did the time go?

I seriously don't know how this happened.

At 6 months old

-She loves playing with her feet.

-She sits up on her own.

-Her favorite food is Sweet Potatoes

-She HATES any kind of fruit.

-Everytime she laughs, she gets the hiccups

-Her laugh is the most incredible sound I've ever heard

-She finally has some rolls on that little body of hers.

-Everytime I'm eating something, she'll watch it go from the plate to my mouth

-She thinks the words "num num" are the funniest words in the entire world

-She fights me when I try to lay her down in her carseat or bath tub. She insists on sitting up in the bath tub now.

-Every night we take her out of the bathtub, she screams bloody murder until we get her pajamas on and her bottle in her mouth.

-She's already talking our ears off. When i'm sitting in the car and I hear her talking, I'll mute the radio just so I can enjoy that sweet little voice of hers.

-She pretty much has everyone in her life wrapped around her finger.

-She's definitely teething

-She constantly needs a new scenery

-She makes the "Ah" sound everytime she yawns. haha

-She is so very tickleish now, it's one of my favorite things

-She thinks it's funny when I sing and dance for her aka: make a fool of myself.

She is my idea of heaven.

Halloween

Kali was a Ladybug for halloween.

The poor girls first Halloween was not a pleasant one though.

She slept in until 11:30, which I thought was so awesome...

until she woke up and I noticed how different she seemed to be acting.

She was just not herself.

She kept grunting and moaning.

She was smiling and not crying,

but she was obviously not feeling well.

She wasn't her normal, upbeat, crazy self.

I shower my Oma three times a week,

so we went there and usually when I'm doing that Kali is sitting in her carseat,

squirming, jabbering and getting mad that I'm making her sit in her carseat.

But this day,

she just sat there and stared at me.

She didn't move at all.

I almost wanted to cry because she looked so miserable.

When we got home,

I took her out of her carseat and immediately could tell she had a fever.

I took her temperature and it was 101.4.

I called the Dr and they wanted to see her right then.

So we drove to the dr and they decided to draw her urine to see if she had another Urinary Tract Infection.

He also looked in her ears.

My poor baby screamed so hard. I've never ever heard Kali cry like she did then.

She was holding her breath and everything.

She's NEVER done that.

The first results for the UTI came back negative,

so he just told me that it was probably just a little virus but to call him if her fever didn't leave in three days, but that they were going to Culture her urine and he would let us know if anything changed

I took her home and cuddled her for the rest of the evening.

She was miserable.

That is how she spent her Halloween.

The next day,

her Doctor called and said that after only a day,

the culture ended up saying that she does indeed have a UTI.

He called back the next day saying this infection was immune to the antibiotic she was on.

so he switched her antiobiotic again.

We are now waiting for her Urologist to call us telling us whether or not she'll need surgery.

To be honest,

I'm pretty set on surgery.

I'm SO not looking forward to it,

but with the way this is all going,

Kali is going to end up immune to every single dang antibiotic,

and she's going to keep getting these infections.

I have done everything in my power to try to prevent these...

I'm just so worried about her at this point.

Anyway.

Haha. This was kind of a pathetic excuse for a Halloween post.

but that is pretty much how it went.